Eating Disorders and Blessings of Dhul Hijjah

Taking Steps Towards Recovery in Dhul Hijjah

The days of Dhul-Hijjah are the most blessed ones; therefore let’s make much from this opportunity. Let us unite and embark on a journey of recovery to defeat the demon of Eating Disorder.

The first ten days of Dhul Hijjah are full of virtues and great blessings.  These 10 days are a blessed gift to us from Allah, a fresh opportunity to erase our sins and cleanse ourselves.The ten nights mentioned in Soorah Al Fajr are the nights of the first ten days of Dhul Hijjah. Allah says:

By the Dawn; By the ten Nights; (89:1-2)

Among the deeds recommended during those ten days are observing voluntary fasting, offering animal sacrifices (lamb, goat, etc.), sincere repentance, recitation of the Quran, staying up the night and finally praying the Eid prayers on the tenth day of Dhul Hijjah.

For those who suffer from Eating Disorders, after Ramadan this is another challenging time of the year.

During these ten days, there is a voluntary fasting on the day of Arafah (9^th of Dhul Hijjah) and many Muslims across the world start observing the fast from 1^st of Dhul Hijjah to ninth of Dhul Hijjah.

"O you who believe fasting is prescribed to you as it was prescribed to those before you so that you can learn Taqwa (God consciousness)."

But do bear in mind that fasting in Islam is not like crash dieting, it is adequate in calorie intake and involves no malnutrition. All religious acts in Islam begin with a Niyyah (Intentions). First of all, behind any action or form of behavior there are certain motives.  What Islam regards as essential is that the motives behind what we say or do should always be directed towards God.  They should always be directed towards the purpose of perusing the pleasure, approval and satisfaction of God. Fasting in this month is purely voluntary and for those who are healthy and able to do so. A person suffering from Eating Disorder at times may be unaware of some of the inner motives that motivates them to fast. Whatever your motive for fasting, Don’t forget that God sees us and knows what is in our hearts.

These last few days of Dhul Hijjah are all about connecting with Allah and seeking His mercy. Don’t let the Demon of Eating Disorder take away the joy and blessings of Dhul Hijjah away from you.

You can live your life free from an eating disorder. Recovery is possible.

We should make the necessary changes to defeat the demon of Eating Disorder, and what better time to make such changes than present, during these blessed 10 days of Hajj, you never know it may change your life forever. We must internalise these changes and make a firm commitment to recovery, Inshallah.

Take these Small Steps towards Recovery



Let’s Increase in glorification & remembrance of Allah -Reciting tasbeeh, tahmeed, tahleel and takbeer abundantly to defeat the voice of Eating Disorder that constantly belittles us and controls us.



The following are some easy and very beneficial dhikr and glorification we can do throughout these blessed days and nights.-

• Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Laa ilaaha illallahu Wallahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Wa lillahil Hamd


• Subhanallah


• Alhamdulillah


• Allahu Akbar


• Laa ilaha ilallah


• La hawla wa la quwwata illa billah


• Asthaghfirullah


• SubhanAllahil azeem wa bihamdihi


• Subhāna-llāhi, wa-l-hamdu li-llāhi, wa lā ilāha illā-llāhu, wa-llāhu akbar. Wa lā hawla wa lā quwwata illā bi-llāhi-l-aliyyi-l-azīm


• Laa ilaaha illal-laahu wahdahu laa shareeka lahu, lahul-mulku wa lahul-hamdu wa huwa ‘alaa kulli shay-in qadeer


• One can also recite the durood that one recites towards the end of one’s salaah or the shortest durood: Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallim.

Tip: Have something in your environment or on your person as a reminder for dhikr. It could be a special ring that you wear or a sticker placed on your desk or car wind shield.

Increase in Good Deeds

Do more good deeds than usual- be kind, love yourself and your family, offer gratitude to Allah, help your community, visit sick and elderly, help your mother with daily chores, be kind and generous to those who are in need, smile, and show immense kindness to yourself.

Give Charity

Show an Exemplary Character

 

 We must aim to be the best in character during these blessed days and nights and continue to do so for the rest of the year. We must not argue, swear, backbite, slander or gossip.

Tip: Make an extra effort to be good to your friends, family, and neighbours, and especially those of other faiths.
Respect and honour thy parents- Make an extra effort to spend time with them during these blessed days. Recite Qur’an with them, read a book together, discuss a lecture you heard, share your plans for the future and seek their input. Call them a few more times in the day if they live far away.

Don’t Forget that Suffering purifies our humanness
When we go through difficult times, when we have a financial loss, when we lose a loved one, when we struck by bad times, it brings out the real humanness in us, and we begin to ask the very questions that are most fundamental to us, “Why are we here?”, “What is the purpose of life”, “why me”, “What happened to all my plans and dreams, etc. We learn the frailty of our humanness. The Prophet of Islam, Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, “Look at the ones who are less fortunate then you, not at the ones are more fortunate then you.”

Take an Oath to Love yourself and to Make Positive Changes in Your Life

Start a 'recovery journal'

Fill it with positive and affirming thoughts. Take excerpts from Quran, Hadith. Use Rumi’s Mathnawi, Ghazali’s work. Write about why you want to recover, how your eating disorder has impacted your life, and anything else that will help to keep you motivated to recover. It’s totally up to you to choose what you write in your journal. Write a plan in your journal for how to manage feelings that trigger the binge and purge cycle. For example: “If I’m feeling angry, I will leave the room.” “If I’m feeling fearful, I will write in my journal what I’m afraid of.” If I’m feeling guilt or shame, I will talk with a friend.”If you do make this plan, you’ll start smiling more with increased awareness. If you don’t do this plan, you’ll stay stuck in your negative feelings and keep bingeing. It’s totally up to you to choose what you write in your journal.

Heal Yourself By Honey

Honey can be the new antibiotic for the 21^st century! Thousands of studies and experiments proved this. The Holy Qur’an, however, proved it 14 centuries back.

Honey cures the following diseases:

                     Anxiety and lack of sleep can be treated by drinking a class of water that has a spoon of honey dissolved in it (honey drink). Scientists found that drinking water with honey has a very calming impact on people.

One spoon of honey everyday can protect you from a deadly heart attack.  This has been proven by new studies made on honey where scientists noticed that honey helps to regulate the work of the heart.

Honey has a wonderful energy in regulating and reducing the symptoms of anxiety, polyneuritis, and other disorders that can be found in the body, in addition to its calming effects.

Work on your Impulsivity

If you feel compelled to binge or purge and feel you cannot control it, begin by trying to delay the binge or purge for 10 minutes by listening to music, calling a friend, or writing in your journal. If you cannot control your impulsivity, you will have a lifetime of regret ahead of you.

One of the  complaint made by recovering anorexics and bulimics is about the size of their stomachs and The Dreaded Bloat. Are you ready to address solutions to the Dreaded Bloat?

“You can’t reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday’s junk.”

Spend time around supportive people

Try to find people who are comfortable with their bodies and don’t spend all their time talking about dieting and food. These might be people who have qualities that you admire and want to develop within yourself.

Talk to other people who are recovering/recovered 

Mutual support can be motivating, and seeing someone else make progress or enjoying life might help to keep you inspired, too. Support groups can be a really great way of seeking support from people going through similar things. . Stay away from people who are emotionally abusive to you. If they even walk in the room, leave as soon as you can. Spending time with positive people is the way to grow your self-esteem and begin to heal. Negative people will just drag you down and leave you wondering if they’re right when they say, “You will never be all right.”

Read recovery-oriented books

These can help inspire and keep you motivated.

Make Dua

Dua/Prayer is a solution of all problems. Allah the Almighty, loves his creation more then seventy mothers. How can HE not listen to us when e are asking for from protection from Anxiety and depression.‘

‘O Allah, I take refuge in You from anxiety and sorrow, weakness and laziness, miserliness and cowardice, the burden of debts and from being over powered by men.’

It is related that when someone fell ill, the Prophet would recite one of these du'as for them.

Allahuma rabbi-nas adhhabal ba'sa, ashfi wa entashafi, la shifa' illa shifa'uka shifa' la yughadiru saqama.

Oh Allah! The Sustainer of Mankind! Remove the illness, cure the disease. You are the One Who cures. There is no cure except Your cure. Grant us a cure that leaves no illness. (Recommended to touch the area of pain with the right hand while reciting this supplication.)

'As'alu Allah al 'azim rabbil 'arshil azim an yashifika.

I ask Allah, the Mighty, the Lord of the Mighty Throne, to cure you. (Recommended to repeat seven times.)

 

Help Others

When “you give happiness, you get happiness”. This is very simple formula to be happy. Giving one’s time to provide happiness to others by engaging in social causes have an  effect on a person’s mood, countenance and disposition.

It can be any act that you can do to make others happy and helping them. Helping someone else will bring and internal feelings of satisfaction and this will help you not to feel low of your self esteem. When  you start to put a smile on others faces, in sha Allah you will  feel happy.

Stay Busy

If someone suffering from ED stays idle, while isolating himself from the world, then there is a greater chance of one being more depressed as it is said that “An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.”. Starting a new hobby can act as solution for your ED anxiety by making you busy. Hobbies bird watching, knitting, reciting the Qur’an, learning, reading books, painting, and writing  are all productive hobbies.

Remember that your responsibility is limited

While we need to carry out our duty to the best of our abilities, always remember that you don't control the outcome of events. Even the Prophets did not control the outcome of their efforts. Some were successful, others were not. Once you have done your duty to your health, mind and body, leave the results to Allah. Regardless of the results of your efforts, you will be rewarded for the part you have played.

However, never underestimate your abilities. Understand the concept of Barakah (blessings from Allah) and remember that Allah can and Insha Allah will expand them if you are sincerely exerting your energies for the right path.

Leave the demands of ED behind you five times a day

Use the five daily prayers as a means to become more connected with Allah and less attached to the demon of Eating Disorder. Start distancing yourself from the demands of Eating Disorder as soon as you hear Adhan, the call to prayer.  When you perform Wudu, keep repeating Shahada, the declaration of faith, as water drops slip down your face, hands, arms, and hair. When you stand ready to pray, mentally prepare yourself to leave your ED and all of its worries and stresses behind you.

Of course, your ED will try to distract you during prayer. But whenever this happens, go back and remember Allah. The more you return, the more Allah will reward you for it.

Please Seek Help!

If you are suffering from an eating disorder, it’s important first and foremost that you seek some professional support. You are not alone. Remember you are not suffering in silence. There are millions of people world-wide who are suffering from this dreadful illness and many worst ailments. Help is out there, all you have to do is reach for it. Through our connections, we will break the chain of eating disorder that leads to depression and anxiety.

Excuse Me the Demon of Eating Disorder! You do not control the world, Allah does. Leave me Alone!

Control has been attributed as a key motivator behind eating disorders. Eating disorders can provide a sense of control and escape, allowing sufferers to temporarily forget depression, anxiety, stress, anger, and guilt. Ironically, the ability for one to exert control over food, accompanies their loss of control in relation to food. It is important to remind ourselves that we don’t control all the variables in the world. God does. He is the Wise, the All-Knowing. Sometimes our limited human faculties are not able to comprehend His wisdom behind what happens to us and to others, but knowing that He is in control and that as human beings we submit to His Will, enriches our humanity and enhances our obedience towards him. It is suggested that Cognitive Behaviour Therapy (CBT) can potentially assist a person's need for control and help adjust maladaptive ways of thinking and behaving.

Begin the Day on a Positive Note

Get up early. Get up thanking God that He has given you another day. Alhamdu lillahil lazi ahyana bada ma amatana, wa ilaihin Nushoor (Praise be to Allah Who gave us life after death and unto Him will be the return). Invest in an audio tape driven alarm clock so you can get up to the melody of the Quran. Develop your to do list for the day if you didn't do it the night before. Begin with the name of Allah, with Whose name nothing in the heavens or the earth can hurt you. He is the Highest and the Greatest. (Bismillahillazi la yazurru maa ismihi shaiun fil arze wa la fis samae, wahuwal Alee ul Azeem). The Prophet used to say this after every Fajr and Maghrib prayers.

Avoid Media Overexposure, Fashion Tabloids: Switch to Books

Don't spend too much time checking out the latest fashions on television or internet and catching up with celeb gossips. Spend more time reading good books and journals. Cut down media time to reduce your stress and anxiety.

Pray for Others to Heal Yourself

The Prophet was always concerned about other people, Muslims and non-Muslims, and would regularly pray for them. Praying for others connects you with them and helps you understand their suffering. This in itself has a healing component to it. The Prophet has said that praying for someone who is not present increases love.

Make the Quran your Partner

Reading and listening to the Quran will help refresh our hearts and our minds. Recite it out loud or in a low voice. Listen to it in the car. Connecting to the Quran means connecting to God. Let it be a means to heal your heart of stress and worries.

"O humanity! There has come to you a direction from your Lord and a cure for all [the ills] in men’s hearts - and for those who believe, a Guidance and a Mercy" (Quran 10:57).

Recite Al-Mu’awwidhatayn ; Surah E falaq and Surah e naas

Eating Disorders are internal  feeling of self-doubt and thinking one’s self  extremely low in esteem. Mainly depression that comes with Eating Disorder is nothing but the deceptive whisperings from the Demon of ED.  If one peruses through the meaning of Suratul Nas, it is  noticed that it is a  best prayer for protection from the whispering of the demon of ED.

The Holy Prophet (SAW) said:

“Do you not see that there have been Ayat revealed to me tonight the like of which has not been seen before. They are “Say: “I seek refuge with, the Lord of Al-Falaq.” (Surah Al-Falaq 113:1) and “Say: “I seek refuge with the Lord of mankind.’‘

(Surah An-Naas 114:1))

[Muslim]

Reciting Surah tul Nas will safeguard one from depression and uplift the mood whenever feelings of self-doubts surface; of one who suffers from depression.

Sleep the way the Prophet slept- This helps trust me...

End your day on a positive note. Make Wudu, then think of your day. Thank Allah for all the good things you accomplished, like Zikr and Salat. Ask yourself what you did today to bring smile to someone’s faceJ. For everything positive, say Alhamdu lillah (Praise be to Allah). For everything negative say Astaghfirullah wa atoobo ilayk (I seek Allah's forgiveness and I turn to You [Allah]). Recite the last two chapters of the Quran, thinking and praying as you turn on your right side with your hand below your right cheek, the way the Prophet used to sleep. Then close your day with the name of Allah on your tongue. Insha Allah, you will have a good, restful night.

Be Thankful to Allah

"If you are grateful, I will give you more" (Quran 14:7).

Counting our blessings helps us not only be grateful for what we have, but it also reminds us that we are so much better off than millions of others, whether that is in terms of our health, family, financial situation, or other aspects of our life. And being grateful for all we have helps us maintain a positive attitude in the face of worries and challenges we are facing almost daily.

Ideals: One step at a time

Ideals are wonderful things to pursue. But do that gradually. Think, prioritize, plan, and move forward. One step at a time.

Efforts not Results Count in the Eyes of Allah

Our success depends on our sincere efforts to the best of our abilities. Unlike our disorder that demands results and is never satisfied, It is the mercy of Allah that He does not demand results, Alhamdu lillah. He is happy if He finds us making our best sincere effort. Thank you Allah! Just do what you can do and leave rest to Allah.